MINNEAPOLIS —
Gov. Tim Walz (D-MN) has officially thrown his hat in the ring to become the first person to go to Mars aboard a SpaceX rocket, “or anything else heading that way.”
“Obviously, I planned on being the Vice President of the United States at this point and didn’t really think about interplanetary travel,” Mr. Walz said from his home above the raucous sounds of passersby. “Over the last few days, I became extremely interested in the idea and sent my ‘ol pal, Elon, a DM inquiring about timeframes,” he continued. “I’m not asking for charity, I can obviously pay full freight, but I’d really like to go as quickly as possible.”
When told that no missions to Mars will be taking place for a number of years, Gov. Walz stated he would very much like to visit Somalia.
In response to our request for comment, Mr. Musk sent a clown emoji.
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