WASHINGTON —
U.S. Immigration and Customs Enforcement announced a series of last minute deals for those wanting to self-deport for the holidays. “It’s the season of giving and we are giving illegal aliens the gift of going home,” DHS Secretary Noem said. “We are open late with holiday hours and have a plan for everyone who wants to take advantage of the best deals we’ve ever had.”
“We have deals for violent gang members, those who have been stealing public funds, child traffickers and spies,” Secretary Noem explained. “All packages include one-way air travel and a bottle of water plus the avoidance of being arrested and sent home anyway.” “We have door-buster prizes for the first 1,000 each day,” she continued, “but hurry, these deals won’t last long.”
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